I’m about to write about this acupuncture appointment. It is one that has created a paradigm shift which means my neck is a little looser and not so wound. I am humbly acknowledging the blow to my ego.
All which have shown me why I am here, lessons I need to learn, perceptions I have based on my social and cultural conditioning. I apologize.
Who knew that acupuncture school would be a deprogramming, reprogramming, quick start booster to yo life!
Looking back, its as if some mystical magic force was telling me to get a treatment today. I have been thinking way too much.
Life has been really interesting lately, and it is apparent now, how excitement and struggle is a state of the mind, mindset.
Life is a beautiful struggle because you find beauty out of the struggle. Your new found wisdom is the reward.
So the diagnosis was a choppy right pulse and a wiry left post. Red tongue, thin yellow furr, and comments about my skin and Shen not looking so healthy.
My skin has been my number one indicator. I know whats best for it, but the discipline has not been there. I am so ready to recode that word or “that act of partaking” into something positive.
Dr. R told me “You have to change your attitude about life.”
And those words stuck especially coming from him.
In his inquiry he was very direct, and though I described it as rude, I realize that he has shown compassion with a dose of reality my way.
In a group observation, he asked the questions, and administered the most transforming treatment thus far. Because the truth is, acupuncture is able to help heal emotional wounds.
Truthfully right in this moment, I feel renewed.
For the past year and a half I’ve been attending American College of Traditional Chinese Medicine. The best thing about it is getting more in touch with my roots. It’s just so awesome to learn about the medicine, art, and training. It’s so fascinating to learn why Chinese Doctors in China were also very skilled martial artists, artists in calligraphy, Scholars, and deeply deeply spiritual people.
Calligraphy teaches attention to detail within the overall picture. There is wrist control and delicate embrace.
Martial Arts teaches awareness of physical body, mental discipline, and the grace of movement.
I just love how the medicine really branches out into different sectors, though unfortunately, many of these have been de-emphasized in modern Chinese Medicine Study programs.
Dr. R needled my left thumb in an unusual way. It felt as if the needles where going a different route, it was painful, but a pain I knew was good for me. The depth and positioning of the needling felt like a reprogramming of some sorts because at that moment, I began to weep. He asked me if it hurt, and I muttered “no” but began to cry more.
After 15 minutes, one of the students observing came back in to turn the needles which was interesting because I have just been learning about different ways to stimulate the points if conditions are in excess or deficient.
She helped me release more, and told me crying would get the qi to move more.
In retrospect, I’m unsure why this is, but interaction with other Chinese people and asian americans have created so many breakthroughs this year. It’s like the experiences are reflecting back to me how I perceive situations through these cultural, societal, and gender roles I play and how understanding them can help me release them.
My introspection gets the best of me. Dr. R says I think too much, which is true, but the student who came in remedied the comment by saying we are women. So is it a gender thing? Possibly. Maybe the levels of conscious thinking is analogous to women only having babies. Oh yes, I would give a day to experience not thinking so much, and being the same every day. But just one, because I welcome the challenge. To say women are more emotional,…might be a stereotype?
If women are more right brained and men are more left brain, then I would hypothesize that eons ago, the use of our respectable systems were predicated upon the environments that women and men inhabited.
Environment calls for adaptation and because our physical body environment differs, it interacts with the environment differently. This can extend from a biological to aesthetic adaption. And even though, we may be men inside woman or women inside man, and exist in other cultural narratives, our similarities share an ideological commonality-the Silverling.
I learned not to be bitter, but understand because we can’t blame anyone for who we or they are. Truthfully there are things I kind of resent about Chinese culture. And I know I shouldn’t have that attitude, but just understand and embrace it and be thankful.
This lesson applies to my life as well. Embrace all that is and have gratitude.